On Mowing and Marriage and Trying to Be Like Jesus

July 17, 2016April 30, 2021 / Apple Hill Cottage / 8 Comments

There’s very little in this life that I like less than mowing grass. Reasons? Oh yeah, I got plenty:

What a waste of time — I could be gardening, reading, writing, washing dishes, mopping the kitchen floor…

What a waste of gasoline and added pollution, when we could be growing food, or flowers, or sheep instead of grass…

Grass has no value whatsoever, unless one is playing golf…

Why would I want to push a horribly noisy smelly machine that could easily cut off my fingers, or my toes, or throw flying sticks or rocks at my head?

I could go on, but you get the idea.

iris

Usually mowing the grass is Mr. H.C.’s job and I don’t have to think about it. But he’s busy doing the roof while the sun shines. (July in Pennsylvania makes watching the Weather Channel unnecessary; we know what the forecast will be: 90 percent humidity and scattered thunderstorms.) And the grass has to be mowed when the sun is shining too. Plus, the tractor is broken. So I’m being the selfless servant and mowing the grass with the push mower.

Right. Not quite so selfless as one might think…

Today as I started mowing, silently congratulating myself on serving my busy husband, he came down off the roof and waved at me to stop. When I stopped, he bent down and raised the mower deck on me. “You’re cutting it too short,” he said. Then he disappeared back up onto the roof.

Excuse me? If I am cutting the grass I will blimey well cut it at the height I want. The shorter the grass, the less it has to be mowed. I’d just as soon kill the wretched grass anyway. That’s the trouble with it, grass doesn’t die. Its roots live forever and come back to haunt you next year after you’ve planted a lovely flower bed there. But I digress.

I confess to being sweaty, hot, and bothered. Muttering the whole time, two passes later, I stopped the mower and lowered the deck back to where it was. But that still didn’t make me feel any better. Here I was — unselfishly mowing the grass so he wouldn’t have to — and he comes to tell me I’m doing it wrong? What kind of ungrateful man is this anyway?

Oh wretch that I am…

I’ve heard enough sermons in my life to know that this is not what Jesus would do. And I’ve also heard enough John Dorean sermons to know that the goal of every Jesus lover is to grow and be more like him every day. Of course, we fail all the time, but that is the goal…

So when I stopped to take a break and get a cool drink of water, I sat down on the couch and picked up the book I’ve been reading. Sacred Marriage. (If you know this book, you may laugh here.)

I had a copy of this book once, but we were newly married and I ended up giving it away to someone before I read it, and I never got it back. Since then I’ve read sections of it, and heard sermons from it, and I know the subtitle by heart — What if God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More than to Make Us Happy?; but I’ve never read it cover to cover.

Turns out, maybe I should have.

I always thought, yeah, yeah, I know what Gary Thomas is going to say. Die to your self. Respect your spouse. Love unconditionally.

And yes, that’s what he says. And yes, it’s hard. And as Thomas says–none of that comes naturally to us.

But as I sat there reading Chapter Six, “The Cleansing of Marriage: How Marriage Exposes Our Sin” I knew. I knew that those words needed to penetrate my soul. Just as I need to die to my Self a hundred, no, a thousand times a day, I also need to desire humility a hundred, no, a thousand times a day.

Of course, we always see our spouse’s sin; it’s so much easier to see other’s sins, isn’t it? Yes, this specifically refers to taking the log out of our own eye before we take the speck out of someone else’s eye (Matthew 7:3-5). Listen to this:

View marriage as an entryway into sanctification — as a relationship that will reveal your sinful behaviors and attitudes and give you the opportunity to address them before the Lord. But here’s the challenge: Don’t give in to the temptation to resent your partner as your own weaknesses are revealed. Correspondingly give them the freedom and acceptance they need in order to face their own weaknesses as well. In this way, we can use marriage as a leg up, a piercing spiritual mirror, designed for our sanctification and growth in holiness.

I needed to re-read that sentence: Don’t give in to the temptation to resent your partner as your own weaknesses are revealed. There it is: the basic sin of all sins–Pride. Lack of humility. Thinking that I know best, yet knowing in my heart and soul that I do not. It’s ugly, pride is. Later Gary Thomas quotes François Fenélon who wrote: “…all the saints are convinced that sincere humility is the foundation of all virtues.”

To grow in holiness marriage must be understood as a spiritual discipline, Thomas says. “To do this,” he writes, “we must not enter marriage predominantly to be fulfilled, emotionally satisfied, or romantically charged, but rather to become more like Jesus Christ.”

There it is again…to become more like Jesus; and to do that we must put on our robe of humility and not throw it off each time we get hot and bothered. And not only do I agree with Fenélon that humility is the foundation of all virtues, but can I suggest that pride just might be the foundation of all sin?

Today as I was reading an article about the need for us to feel awe before our holy God, I came across the term self-forgetfulness. How I longed for it. The author, Jen Wilkin, cited research that suggests when humans feel awe they are better able to forget themselves and reach out to other people. And I started wondering–what else makes me put on self-forgetfulness?
Blue sky behind gray clouds Doing something for someone else with no expectations. (Remember mowing the lawn? It went wrong because of my own expectation–that my husband would be pleased and thank me profusely for doing something I hated to do.)
Praying–talking to the Holy God of the Universe — yes, that’s one that definitely gets the mind off oneself.
Thinking about Jesus–whether it is reading the Bible, listening to worship music, or just meditating on how weak and incompetent I am, and how strong and competent Jesus is for me.
So here we have: Go watch a sunset or the clouds or stand on a beach or a mountain; Make dinner for your neighbor; Read your favorite passage in God’s word and thank Him for it; Meditate on the strength of Jesus and your own shortcomings and feel awe that you are so loved.

As I read further in Sacred Marriage, this paragraph jumped out at me:

Don’t run from the struggles of marriage. Embrace them. Grow in them. Draw near to God because of them. Through them you will reflect more of the Spirit of Jesus Christ. And thank God that he has placed you in a situation where your spirit can be perfected.

And today, in the sermon I heard this: He loves us where we are at any given moment. Certainly He invites, encourages, challenges us to become more like Christ, but that becoming is not a prerequisite of His love. Can I get an Amen?

white clover

It’s time to mow the grass again…

The tractor is fixed. As Mr. H.C. took it for a mowing spin to see how it was running, he said, “I’m not going to mow the grass very short, because there are lots of bees on the clover, and I don’t want to mow the flowers away.” Yeah, he knows how much I like bees and clover…

I smiled to myself. Thank you God that you have placed me in a situation where my spirit can be perfected.

And thank you God, that the tractor is fixed.

The back porch smells like garlic…

July 10, 2016July 4, 2016 / Apple Hill Cottage / 8 Comments

This is the first year either of us has ever grown garlic. So it seems kind of silly to do a DIY post on how to grow it, but I’m telling you, if all you’ve ever had is store bought cured garlic? Oh my. There is nothing like fresh garlic — it is mellower, tastier, and just all-round better.
fresh garlic harvest

We planted the cloves last fall in mid-October. Fall 2015, was incredibly mild for SW Pennsylvania. We didn’t even have a frost until mid-November (at least up here on our ridge — the valleys got it earlier). So the garlic grew. It was almost six inches tall and overwintered at that height. It made me nervous, and we mulched the plants heavily with straw, just in case. All the experts say not to worry, that garlic will overwinter fine, and it did.

In retrospect, I should have fertilized it more this spring. I added a light top dressing of mushroom manure, but I think I should have been heavier with it, because the outer leaves never did green up. The bottom couple of leaves always had yellow tips.

I planted a pound each of two different varieties of hardneck garlic — Polish White and Siberian — ordered from The Garlic Store. They sell organic seeds and they send your order just about when you should be planting it for your area. I think I should have ordered another pound; two pounds made for four eight-foot rows. I wanted more…

About early June the center stalk (called a scape) starts curling around. I cut them out — everything I read said the bulbs will get bigger if the plant doesn’t have to put energy into producing the scapes. I started poking around in the soil the last week of June, and the bulb I dug up wasn’t quite ready — it didn’t have nicely formed cloves yet, but I used it anyway by pressing chunks through my garlic press.

Turns out I was digging in the wrong section… The two rows of Siberian garlic had a shorter growing season. Yesterday, on July 3rd, I dug most all of those two rows up. They are huge and beautiful. The Polish Whites are not quite ready yet. (The experts say to dig the garlic when the lower third to half of the outer leaves have started to dry and turn brown.)

garlic and onions drying on the back porch

We are drying these beauties on a drying rack on an out-of-the-way spot on the back porch because we had the drying rack and we might as well use it. (It was originally made for onions and winter squash). Most folks braid the garlic and hang it. It is supposed to dry for 3-4 weeks before winter storage. This rack is full with the Siberian garlic, so I’m going to try braiding the next batch when I harvest it in a couple of weeks.

And it would be a sad garlic post without a recipe…

Roasted Garlic and Beets with Walnut/Rosemary Pesto

Beets. garlic, rosemary & walnuts Ingredients: 6-8 beets
8 unshelled walnuts, or 1/2 c. finely chopped walnuts
1-2 sprigs of fresh rosemary
1 sliced onion
1 head of garlic
olive oil, salt & pepper (This recipe serves 6-8)

Choose a nice large garlic and slice the top of the end off so you can see the cloves inside. Also slice off the back root end if necessary. Peel back as much of the papery skin as you can, so you just have the cloves. Brush the top with olive oil, and wrap in a small piece of foil.

Put in the oven at 400 degrees for approximately 25-30 minutes. While the garlic is roasting, chop the walnuts, dice up the fresh rosemary, and peel the beets and chop them.

I know there are only 4 beets here — after I started the recipe and got the beets chopped, I went out to get a few more. I think two medium beets per person is about right.

When chopping the beets, the key is to keep the pieces uniform in size so they will all be done at the same time.

roasted whole garlic When the garlic has five minutes left, put the walnuts in and let them roast with the garlic for the remaining five minutes. The garlic should be aromatic and soft and starting to brown when you open the packets of foil. Let the garlic cool while you slice an onion, and toss the beets and onion with some olive oil and kosher salt. Place on baking sheet and put in the 400 degree oven for 15 minutes.

roasted beets

Chop the walnuts finely. You should have about 1/2 cup.

Using a cocktail fork, separate the garlic cloves and remove the meaty garlic cloves from the skins. Discard the skins and put the cloves in a small bowl and mash them with the fork. Add the chopped rosemary, and mash together. Stir in the chopped walnuts. Add a teaspoon or so of olive oil and a dash of kosher salt.

When the timer rings at 15 minutes, take out the beets and stir them around well. Put them back in the oven for another 15 minutes. When they are fork tender, stir into a serving bowl and toss with the roasted garlic-walnut-rosemary mixture.

roasted garlic, beets, and walnuts

Looks like dessert, doesn’t it?

Some people might say this recipe begs for some goat cheese, but it absolutely doesn’t need it. Besides I was going for an all-home-grown side dish; and there are no plans to get a goat. But there are plans to try a pound of another type of garlic for this fall…

How Can Such a Little House Have Such Big Demands?

July 6, 2016July 5, 2016 / Apple Hill Cottage / 11 Comments

We’ve been doing lots of little things on the house of late, but none of them has been post-worthy on its own.

Earlier this spring, Mr. H.C. put bricks under the front windows to finish them.

Front windows Before

Front windows After

We also cleaned the brick, took out the old yews, and put in some new landscaping.

All landscaping plants are deer-resistant. Unfortunately, the sunflowers I planted weren’t rabbit proof…

We updated our outdoor seating — Mr. H.C. put new wood on the seats of these old chairs, and I painted them.

I painted away the last of the blue gray cedar shakes, and Mr. H.C. built an arbor for our grapes inside the garden gate to protect them from the local plant predators.

There’s a new planter for herbs and cherry tomatoes on the sunny side of the back porch; it looks like it has always been there.

We took down the hideous-looking gutter from the front porch and added a nice new face board.

Once that was done, we agreed that the ugly painted plywood ceiling above the porch just wouldn’t do (it was so ugly, I never even took a photo of it…)

…so we gutted the ceiling and replaced it with traditional porch beadboard. It was a great day when that plywood ceiling came down.

But the really exciting news is that last week two trucks from Home Depot delivered a new door, a new window, and roofing materials and shingles. Mr. H.C. was anxious to get started on the roof, so I was surprised one evening when he came in and said, “I really think we should put the door in first. I don’t want it sitting around getting scratched up.”

Replace Sliding Glass Door # 3? I danced with glee. (There were originally FIVE sets of sliding glass doors in the cottage when we acquired it. ~~Two are gone~~. Three are now gone! This was Mr. H.C’s project all the way. All I did was pick the doors, the color, help move them across the yard, and shout encouragement from the sidelines.

The project would have gone faster, but like all old cottage projects, one must expect the unexpected. Or, at least, not be surprised. The sill under the sliding glass doors looked like this when we took it out:

So extra work was involved rebuilding the sill, adding concrete and raising the new doors a bit to make a lovely (and solid) new concrete sill. These doors enter into what is lovingly called the garage bedroom. It used to be the garage. When the inside is finished, it will be the office, a guest bedroom, and the tv room — it’s a small room to be a threefer…